We all ruminate. We all worry about things. We all have to struggle against negative thought patterns. But there are steps that you can take that can help you in this fight, so you start to win the battle, and turn your thoughts around. These include:
1. Notice when you are slipping into negative, absolutist ways of thinking where you think the worst of yourself, your life and your future.
2. Recognise that these are habitual ways of thinking. It’s what you always think when you start to feel bad.
3. Be aware of triggers. Often certain people and situations trigger painful, negative self-destructive thoughts. Try and distance yourself from these, or completely avoid them, if you possibly can.
4. Deliberately look for the counter arguments. For example, when have things been a bit better, when have you done something right, when has someone been kind and understanding?
5. Visualise positive things that make you happy, such as curling up with a book in bed, listening to your favourite music, and so on. Often changing our thinking to things that make us happy changes our negative feelings and thoughts.
6. Get into the habit of building yourself up, so you notice and affirm your successes, strengths, good intentions and positive traits.