Below are some common definitions of trauma. “Trauma is any experience of threat, disconnection, isolation, or immobilization that results in physical/ emotional injuries that dysregulate the optimal functioning of one’s body, emotions, brain, spirit or health.” – Mastin Kipp “Trauma by definition is unbearable and intolerable. (Traumatized people) become so upset when they think about […]
How to Tap into Your Inner Strength in the Aftermath of Trauma — Don’t Lose Hope
“It’s important that we share our experiences with other people. Your story will heal you, and your story will heal somebody else. When you tell your story you free yourself, and you give other people permission to acknowledge their story as well.” – Iyanla Vanzant We need to be able to talk about what happened. […]
What? You too? — Don’t Lose Hope
“Sometimes closure arrives two years later, on an ordinary Friday afternoon, in a way you never expected, or could have predicted. And you cry a little, and you laugh a little, and for the first time in a long time … you exhale. Because you are free.” – Authentic Soul Care No-one knows what their […]
On Healing and Closure — Don’t Lose Hope
“Trauma is the unthinkable. The unbelievable. The unbearable. The unspeakable.” Trauma is extremely hard to talk about. And this burden is intensified by lies that we believe. These include the lies of shame, of fear, and isolation. 1. The lie of SHAME – This is tied to the belief that there’s something wrong with us. […]
3 Lies that Keep us Stuck in our Trauma — Don’t Lose Hope
1. Try to put into words exactly how you’re feeling. Is it the pain of rejection? Is it an overwhelming feeling of shame and self-loathing? Is it a sense of disbelief that you’ve been treated so cruelly by others? Is it a sense of utter desperation?
2. Try to find a way of expressing the pain. Sometimes we can tell the person who has hurt us– but often we feel that they won’t be responsive. If that is the case, find someone you can open up to. It’s really important that you have the chance to honestly express what you’re going through. If you feel there’s no-one you can talk to right now, then perhaps try journaling, or using some kind of art, like music or painting.
3. If the pain’s related to something that happened, admit that you can’t go back and change the past. You need to let it go and keep your eyes ahead. You are not defined by what happened to you, and you have what it takes to live a rich, rewarding life.
4. Related to this, forgive yourself and don’t hold on to regrets. Learn what you can – and then choose to move ahead. Don’t be a victim of your past, or other people.
5. Reconnect with who you were previously. Think of who you might have been if this had never happened. You can still be that person: they are still a part of you.
6. Focus on the things that bring you joy and happiness, and focus on those people who love care for you.
“I’m so tired of the narrative that trauma makes you tough. We are survivors, not superheroes.” – Jules Rylan The fact is: trauma turns your whole life upside down. You’re simply not the person that you were before this happened. And often you will find that you are fighting intense battles against shame and self-hatred. […]
Quote of the Day — Don’t Lose Hope
“She is a beautiful piece of broken pottery put back together by her own hands. A critical world judges her cracks while missing the beauty of how she made herself whole again.” -J.M. Storm It’s easy to judge when we don’t know the full story, or when putting others down meets a need in our […]
You Beautiful Thing! — Don’t Lose Hope
“Hope is being able to see that there is light, despite all the darkness.” It can be hard to find hope when we’re battling despair. But there are some strategies that can help with hopelessness, and the feeling that “it’s pointless – because nothing’s going to change.” They include: 1. Try joining the dots: Think […]
Finding Hope – Some Practical Steps — Don’t Lose Hope
“A sign of progress is noticing your mind is turbulent, and not trusting how you see yourself during that time.” Some questions to ask yourself at these times include: How do I know I’m not in my right mind just now? What has just happened/ Has something just triggered me? When have I felt like […]
We’re Getting There … — Don’t Lose Hope
“And if today, all you did was hold yourself together, I am proud of you.” – Unknown
Coaching Skills International 