I recently came across a really helpful mantra for managing intense, overwhelming emotions. In its simplest form, the mantra is: 1. Notice 2. Accept 3. Check 4. Stay 1. Notice what you’re feeling when emotions are stirred. Don’t ignore what is happening inside your head and body. Don’t deny, or suppress, or trivialize your feelings. […]A Mantra for Managing Emotions — Don’t Lose Hope
So Much for Self-Help! — Don’t Lose Hope
It happened unexpectedly. One moment I was standing in the sea, riding the beautiful turquoise waves. The next moment I was being pulled down and down, caught by the powerful undertow. Never have I experienced such power. Never have I experienced such utter helplessness. Then, as suddenly as it happened, it was over again. No […]So Much for Self-Help! — Don’t Lose Hope
How to Cope with Flashbacks
Flashbacks are memories of past traumas. They can occur in a number of different forms – as sounds, images, smells, body sensations, numbness (or a lack of sensations). Often they’re accompanied by a feeling panic, where the individual feels trapped and completely powerless. Flashbacks can also occur in dreams. Because the sensations are so frightening and intense – and are unrelated to what’s happening in the present – the person often feels as if they’re going crazy. What to do to cope with flashback:
1. Tell yourself that you are having a flashback – that it will pass in time – and soon everything will return to normal.
2. Remind yourself that the worst is over – as these terrifying feelings are re-experienced memories. The event that took place is now lodged in the past, and you managed to survive it, and will survive it now.
3. Allow yourself to express the powerful feelings of terror, panic, hurt and/or rage. It is right that you honour your experience.
4. Ground yourself firmly in the here-and-now. Breathe deeply. Notice the sounds and sensations around you in the room. Allow the feelings of panic and terror to slowly dissipate. Keep breathing deeply, and exhaling deliberately. Allow a sense of calm to gradually replace the faintness, shakiness, dizziness and tightness.
5. Reorient yourself. Keep focusing on what you can see, hear, feel, smell, touch and feel in the present. Feel the chair supporting you. Use your five senses to bring you back to this point in time.
6. Speak to your terrified inner child. Reassure them that they are going to be OK. Tell them they are safe in the present. They are not trapped. They can escape at any time.
7. Seek professional support to deal with your flashbacks. Find an experienced therapist who is trained to guide you to a place of healing. You do not have to do cope with this alone. There is help available for you.